I am a pediatrician living in Chicago who was diagnosed with limited scleroderma five years ago. I am married and have a son.

I was diagnosed with CREST, the limited form of systemic scleroderma, about 5 years ago. I was in my first year of plastic surgery residency and had started noticing some abnormal symptoms: I began having heartburn, my fingers would turn white and painful in the operating room, I started having red splotches on my forehead, and I was more tired than I felt I should be. I knew about CREST syndrome from medical school and I was worried. The first doctor I saw said “you can’t have scleroderma; you look too good and you’re able to work 100 hours a week!” To humor me, he agreed to draw some labs. They were positive.

The next 6 months or so were a blur of testing. I even had a heart catheterization! I also continued planning my wedding. At that point I couldn’t face the fact that I might need to change my career plans. The rheumatologists that I saw, including the wonderful Dr. Varga, couldn’t tell me for sure what my prognosis was. In the meantime I was doing well in my surgery residency and was well-liked (not an easy task to accomplish, even in the best of health!) Only 77 people in the country are accepted into plastic surgery residency programs per year, and my ego didn’t want to give up the prestige of being one of those 77.

But one slow call night at a community hospital, it occured to me that it was foolish for me to continue a career where my livelihood depended on the dexterity of my hands.

After a period of real depression and soul-searching, I decided that I was really meant to be a pediatrician and to specialize in the treatment of children with cancer. My career path has not been straight, but I really believe that this is what I was meant to do.